Thomas, passionate doubter and passionate believer

John 20:19-38
for Healing Service May 4 2011

In just these few verses from John’s Gospel, we see Thomas deny the possibility of the resurrection: dead is dead, and he knew it. ... And we see him fall to the ground and worship Jesus with just as much certainty.

How often in our lives have we been Thomas, demanding proof, insisting something just wasn’t possible? How often, also, have we declared our faith so strongly we fell to the floor to worship God, or at least imagined ourselves doing so?

A life of faith is often like that, moments of doubt or denial, accompanied by even stronger faith and trust in God’s power and presence.

Nettie had a rock-solid faith. She lived in a dangerous part of Chicago, on the south side near the hospital where I worked for a summer. Because there were often bullets spraying around the neighborhood, they rarely spent time in the living room in the front of the house. Mostly they spent their time in the back of the house, in the dining room and kitchen, where it was a bit safer.

Because of the way things were in that part of Chicago, Nettie had nieces and nephews and grandchildren living with her, because others were not reliable parents, or had been killed by stray bullets. She was always surrounded by a noisy, cheerful gaggle of family members. She and her strong faith brought sunshine to a dark neighborhood in a challenging time.

Nettie had diabetes, and had already had the lower portion of her right leg removed. When she wanted to get around she attached the prosthetic leg and went wherever she wanted to. She perched on a stool in the kitchen to cook meals for her family. She was slower than she had once been, but she was determined losing a leg was not going to limit her.

When I met Nettie, she was in the hospital because the left foot was infected. As I visited with her, she said, “I just wish they would cut it off, because it hurts me so much.” She said this even though it would really interfere with her ability to get around. Even if she moved slowly, with one sore foot and one prosthetic leg, she could still get herself up and down the stairs to her house. She could still go upstairs to the bedroom when she wanted to.

With both legs gone, it would be a different story. She would be much more dependent on a wheelchair, and she would need help getting into and out of the house. For the rest of her life, she would sleep in a room on the first floor. At least it would be in the back of the house, where it was safer.

At this point, the doctors had done all they could for her, and it was time for the leg to be removed. I prayed with Nettie before the surgery, and checked with her later in the day. She was sitting up in bed with her prosthetic leg on the right leg, and bandages on the left leg. Several members of her family were there, and they were all laughing and telling stories.

Nettie was always like that. Whatever she faced, she faced it head on, knowing she could manage it, with God’s help. I’m sure she must have had times when she wasn’t sure God was there, that God didn’t care that she lived in constant danger, both from infections and from the gangs in the neighborhood. But when I was with her, her faith was so solid, she just knew she would be all right, if the doctors could simply end her pain. She went home a day later, to heal and do therapy, and learn to live with two prosthetic legs. Her strong faith would get her through this new trial.

... Thomas’ strong faith would get him through all the trials he faced as well. We don’t know for sure what happened to Thomas, but traditions say he went to share the good news in India. I’m sure he took his certain faith with him, and brought others to worship Jesus just as passionately as he did.

Today, we can pray that our faith will remain as strong as Thomas’ faith, once he realized that God can do what seems to be impossible. Or at least as strong as Nettie’s faith, as she faced health challenges.

Please pray with me: Loving God, be patient with us when we doubt you, and  strengthen our faith in those moments. Lead us to such strong faith that we are able to declare with Thomas, “My Lord and my God.” Amen